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Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection, by John T. Cacioppo
Ebook Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection, by John T. Cacioppo
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Review
“A magnificent exposé.†- Frans de Waal“Wise, beautifully written, and often funny…a tour-de-force.†- Shelley E. Taylor, professor of psychology, University of California, Los Angeles“Superb.†- Library Journal
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About the Author
John T. Cacioppo (1951―2018) was a psychology professor at the University of Chicago and director of the university’s Center for Cognitive and Social Neuroscience. He was the author of more than a dozen books, including Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connections.William Patrick, former editor for science and medicine at Harvard University Press, is editor in chief of the Journal of Life Sciences. He lives in Ipswich, Massachusetts.
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Product details
Paperback: 336 pages
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company; Reprint edition (August 10, 2009)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0393335283
ISBN-13: 978-0393335286
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 0.9 x 8.3 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.9 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.0 out of 5 stars
64 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#19,861 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I had the privilege of meeting Dr. Cacioppo and his lovely wife a few years ago at a lecture he gave at Baldwin Wallace University in Berea Ohio. He was an intelligent, caring person. His book documents his life's work on loneliness. The book is part of his legacy. He past away earlier this month. The book reveals the all too often hidden devastating effects that loneliness has on people who is chronically alone. It demonstrates how being alone can lead to aging and declining health. Quoting Dr. Cacciopo from his book "Loneliness": The data tell us that loneliness seriously accelerates age-related declines in health and well-being, yet the idea of promoting connection is rarely discussed alongside the heated issues of the cost of pharmaceuticals and other medical interventions necessary to deal with an increasingly lonely, isolated, and agin population."He adds: "Given the statistical impact of loneliness, if its effects were caused by an impurityin our air or water, perhaps now there would be congressional hearings on how to reduce it. Perhaps we can hope for a similar awakening to the idea, grounded in rigorous science, that restorning bonds among people can be cost-effective and practical point of leverage for solving some of our most pressing social problems, not the least of which is the looming crisis in health care and eldercare."Dr. Cacioppo points out the need for a place for people to gather and demonstrates how places of faith worship have fulfilled that need in the past. "The type of Christianity tht went on to become the primary structural element of the Western world focused on a simple message of self-esteem - "The kingdom of God is within you" -- combined with communal meals and even communal living. Its streamlined theology set aside the complex cleansing rituals of Judaism, and it presented evil less in mystical terms and more as a question of the behavior of one person toward another. The church that survived and prospered extended the basic ethics of the Hebrew tradition -- already a strong source of social support -- explicitly into the individual's inner life, creating a prohibitions against mere thoughts that were harmful to social connections: anger, hatred, misdirected lust. It dispensed with the temple in Jerusalem as the center of religious life, but maintained rituals to sanctify the basic elements of ordinary human existence: reproduction (marriage), birth (baptism), illness (anointment), and death (last rites). By way of these ceremonies it provided guidelines for social connection throughout the life cycle, making this universal church a practical social convention; It offered self-worth, it buried the dead, and it provided for the poor. Like Judaism, Islam, Confucianism and Buddhism, Christianity regulated all social transactions with the community, ranging from relationships within marriage and the family to standards for conducting business and dealing with neighbors."Social connections are life saving connections. When we gather with our family, friends and neighbors, we produce the "happiness hormone" Oxcytocin. When we are isolated, when we move far away from family, when we begin to age and lose the close contact with our children our friends, when we stop going to church because the beliefs we once held are no longer relevant to us, is when we begin our own decline. We need other people in our lives. It's as important to have people who care about us and who we care about as it is to have the very oxygen we breath in the air.I am a technology buff. I love my Apple devices. However, after reading Loneliness, I have awakened my appreciation of and my awareness for the need to put those amazing devices in their separate compartments in my life. If we do not break the hold technology has on the majority of people today, we will suffer the coming consequences of being Avatar's instead of human beings.I love and appreciate Dr. Cacioppo's work on loneliness. It's a topic all too often not only disregarded in todays fast paced society but an aspect of life that has faded into the background of the screens of our devices. We no longer sit on a porch on a warm summer evening sharing a cool drink or a beer with a couple of neighbors while the children play around us. We are all too busy checking our devices, making comments on Facebook, or playing video games. As Dr. Caccioppo points out people need real people in front of them - talking, laughing, sharing, learning from each other. We need to see their faces, feel their emotions, read their body language and feel their touch. Emoticon's are a very poor attempt to replace actual living human beings in our lives.
Book is terrifically interesting when it focuses on the case studies, group experiments, and measurable findings. But when it veers off and the footnotes end, it loses steam. The author has completed extensive research into the effects of loneliness on the human brain and behaviors, including its impact on cognitive skills, ability to complete specific tasks, etc.. I enjoyed learning about how compliments and feelings of adequacy or acceptance by peers greatly improved cognitive abilities, while the lack of esteem/self-worth or even negative feedback caused study participants to perform poorly. It says a lot about how human beings need one another.As I read further, though, it became clear that the author's primary goal (and purpose for this book) is: explain loneliness and all of its related effects in purely materialistic (philosophical materialism) terms. Accordingly, loneliness is just a matter of evolutionary behaviors and responses developed in the struggle for survival. The author supports this thesis through suppositions about how hominids formed communities in order to survive. Here the extensive footnoting and source citations become scant because the author is relying on imagination. These sections say more about how vividly the opening third of Kubrick's "2001: A Space Odyssey" impacted the author than how loneliness boils down to juices pulsing through the brain.There's a gap between the tangible research he's devoted his professional life to and the imaginary scenes he's invented. He's operating from a paradigm that the evidence will only (and obviously) support a naturalistic/materialistic theory about loneliness. He's certain that feelings associated with loneliness, such as isolation, shame, and unworthiness are tantamount to how heat tells us fire will burn us, and nothing more. Without sufficient evidence to support or confirm this, the book is really only interesting for its case studies and their summarized findings.
It's rather uplifting given the title, focusing predominantly on what it means to NOT feel lonely. Dr. Cacioppo wisely distinguishes social connection from happiness to find the right contrast to his subject. The next one hundred pages focuses on plenty of psychological research, buttressed with field interviews, all grounded in a fine understanding of neural circuitry and genetic heritage to explain just why we're NOT predisposed to fates "solitary, poor, nasty brutish and short." His ability to seamlessly integrate different fields of research and reinforce his argument clearly represent his University of Chicago position and background. But it's his ability to convey a hopeful and meaningful view of human existence as shared that stands out as singularly accessible. Kudos!
too clinical. the description seemed like the book was for regular people, not doctors etc...
If the first 19 pages are any indication, this is a most excellent book. It came out in 2008 and I feel bad that I did not get my hands on it 5 years ago. I think it should be required reading by a lot of people, especially teachers, counselors, and doctors, especially psychologists and psychiatrists. And if you are going through a period of loneliness or you know someone who is, by all means read this book and give them a copy. Its probably one of the most helpful tools you can have to deal with the issue of loneliness.
While a bit technical in a few places, this book gives wonderful and valuable insights into understanding, dealing with - and taking action to reduce - loneliness.
Great book! Just what I needed as a reference for my book in progress "Beyond The Warrior.". It illustrates well the multiple dangers of isolation to human health.
Fascinating analysis of human interactions revealing the importance of spontaneous and unconditional altruism. Loneliness is assuaged when we are good to each other
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